Things have been hectic, busy, wonderful. I went on a great run with my dog today around my parent’s neighborhood. So much of feeling good when I exercise has a lot to do with how I eat. Since I got back from Puerto Rico I’ve eaten a ton of fried food, gluten, dairy, and other things that just don’t make me feel good. Yesterday I packed a bag, two vegan cookbooks, and a few novels for a few days of running, reading, and good eating in the suburbs. It has almost been like a meditation retreat since I got here.
Feeling at peace and content after my run, I come home to less than pleasant news. I don’t want the little things to bother me anymore. I made the choice to shut my phone off, leave the laptop alone (except to write this), and enjoy the weather, cook some more food, and cuddle with the pup. I get to fall asleep reading, unaffected, to wake up, unaffected, maybe do a craft or meditate, unaffected. Maybe it was because I traveled so recently, maybe it was because I got the bad news after I was already beat from a hilly two-mile run, but nothing in life feels so serious right now. After a sudden pang of disappointment dissipated all I have left is myself, separate from any feelings, and right now that is not so bad.