Run.

A 365 Day Tribute to the Victims of the Boston Bombing

Tag: law school

Day Twenty-Four

Finals Season

Tomorrow is it. My last final, my last day as a 1L law student. This year has been life-changing, depressing, isolating, beautiful. I’ve learned so much about myself. I feel like a completely different person.

I had an interview today for a grant to supplement my unpaid internship and the interviewer offered me the $4,000 on the spot. I don’t have to work a second job this summer, which is so relieving. There is a feeling of guilt that comes along with the gratitude  Sometimes I feel like I don’t deserve these good things that happen to me because I am still so flawed.

I got to run past the memorial in Copley Square this morning after the interview. It was raining in Boston this morning, so plastic bags were covering most of the memorial to protect it from getting wet. It  has grown exponentially since the Wednesday after…

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The church by the memorial offered pieces of cloth to write prayers on:

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Running felt great today. Early in this blog I decided I wasn’t “running for Boston”, but that what happened last month inspired me to run for me. It’s the end of a crazy and stressful point in my life, and there is so much about myself I want to work out. I spend a lot of time thinking, obsessing, feeling less-than. But these days I am running my way through it. It feels like I was meant to be doing this all along…

Now, back to studying for the last time this school year.

Day Twenty-Three

Finals Season

Quick update before bed. I have one final left on Friday (!!!) and then I can return to being a real person with normal stress levels. I put on some Lowell pride for my run tonight:

 

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At the Guru’s suggestion I conquered a hill by my apartment at the end of my run to see if I could do it. And I could do it. Here’s the view from the top:

 

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I have an interview in the morning for a grant that would give me enough funding to not have to work a second job this summer, so I am sending myself some good vibes, and I’m praying for my amazing brother in San Fran who is prepping to take the MCAT this Saturday.  Good energy day, all around. Since my interview is by the memorial in Copley, hopefully I can go for a run there, which I have been trying to do for a couple weeks now. 

I am feeling really positive today about all I have accomplished. I feel like I am headed into a period of growth, and I am grateful. Goodnight, everyone. 

Days Twenty and Twenty-One

Finals Season

As I make it half-way through finals some interesting things from the past came up. I have good friends to be there for me and let me borrow their running shoes when I am away from home (thanks Molly!). As for right now, I am counting down the minutes finals are over and I can jump ship to Puerto Rico for some serious reflection and re-evaluation, then come back and head to Boston’s FIRST festival, and check out some shows around town before I start my amazing internship. Here’s a cell phone picture from my quick run in Somerville, Winter Hill, of the ubiquitous blossom around Boston and a streetlight.

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For now, I am just glad I have the people I do and I am glad good times are on the horizon.

Day Nineteen

Finals Season

Thoughts before a run:

My windows are open as I try to study for a final, schedule time for a run, and plan a trip to Puerto Rico that I saved up for during undergrad (I am so thankful that I planned ahead for that!). There are birds singing and salsa playing. I am so close to the end of this incredibly difficult year. Law school was so mentally and emotionally taxing. I didn’t exactly handle a lot that was thrown at me with grace, but it’s that very lack of grace that has set me up to do better. Sometimes messing up, going through the wringer, letting people see you struggle is the best way to toughen up. I feel tough(er). I feel like running for only nineteen days has helped make me tougher. Tough is good. It’s okay to be sad and scared when tragedy strikes, but it’s better to be tough. 

Three finals, a few weeks, and ten more degrees is all that separates me from jumping in my ’02 Sonata that I barely have gas money for and going to Hampton, York, Cape Cod, Wingaersheek, Plum Island, and… work. That’s 35 hours a week, unpaid and I’m lucky for it… and I have to find a place to waitress on the weekends somewhere on my beautiful, albeit, trashy Revere Beach Boulevard just to be able to afford to work for free during the week. But I am not going to complain about the economy in 2013 or act like I have it tough because I am not entitled to anything but the money I earn and the free-time I have leftover, and that means sometimes having fun is just counting down the minutes to when my boyfriend drives into the city in his Ford Ranger even though Route 16 is a neon nightmare so we can eat french fries on the beach and good God do I love New England and being broke and being almost 25 and being in love.